Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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