Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
