I can tuck mytits in my pants
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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