dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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