well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
