but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
