Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Randomize
