Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
