So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Randomize
