I just threw up on my dentist
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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