Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Randomize
