love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Randomize