I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
My vagina just clenched in fear
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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