He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
