Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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