Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
