would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
