So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
