I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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