you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
