At least make sure they are 18
Why
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
