He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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