butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize