You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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