Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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