Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
