have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
