I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Just high enough for therapy.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Randomize
