My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize