All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
