Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
