The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize