After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Randomize
