Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Randomize
