He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Randomize
