Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
