somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
