ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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