how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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