PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
