I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
