My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
And then he peed in my hair
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