escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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