I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
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