I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
