we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Randomize