Plan B is the new Plan A
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
