we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
