i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
