Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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